A last minute stocking stuffer from Planned Parenthood

How would you like to wake up on Christmas morning to find a gift certificate in your stocking? How about one from Planned Parenthood?

 

Before you explode with moral outrage—if that’s something you feel inclined towards doing–think about what a gift like this says. Even though 95% of PP’s business is terminating pregnancies, they do provide other related services like screenings and birth control. Would you want to receive a free pap smear this holiday season? How about a pelvic exam?

 

I’d imagine the same feminists who would storm the gates with pitchforks and torches to emasculate any man daft enough to give his woman a kitchen appliance as a holiday gift, are probably more than just OK with a pelvic exam (pap-smear or even, you know what) from Planned Parenthood as a suitable Yule tide offering.  This of course completely abrogates (or should I say aborts?) the last vestiges of a tradition that began by acknowledging life and creation with gifts, and a divine one at that. 

 

 

 

I mean reallly, do you know a man who would actually give this gift to the woman in his life–and if he did should he be suspicious?  And doesn;t this just add a whole new dimension to the secret Santa or Yankee Swap at the office or family party?

 

Well, be prepared.  Planned Parenthood in Indiana (and I beleive Michigan) are offering gift certificates of varying cash values, to anyone with the perspicacity to put the “planned” back into Planned Parenthood.  In fact the organization has considered running the program all year round so it can’t be too long before the gift that says you really care is available in our corner of Mother natures womb.

 

 

 

Is there a woman in your life who has been neglecting her reproductive scheduled maintenance?

 

 

 

And what exactly are the rules of etiquette for this kind of giving?

 

 

 

Should we expect gift cards next with cute little pictures on them?  How distasteful will that get?

 

 

 

If you can even stand to think about it, the marketing opportunities boggle the mind.  Birthdays, holidays, divorces?  How about from your “uncle” on the anniversary of “that special day?”  You getting all of this governor–no parental consent in NH–Lynch?

 

 

 

I can actually picture the ‘Gift begins with Kay’ commercialization. A tender moment outdoors at night, soft holiday lighting, a gentle snowfall.  She smiles coyly–almost blushing (or is it the cold air?)–as the face each other, gloved hands reaching out between them.  But just before they can embrace he reaches into his pocket and…

You know MBNA credit will be all over this.  Introducing the Planned Parenthood credit card.   Turn your everyday purchases of gas and groceries into reward points you can redeem on ‘reproductive services’ at any Planned Parenthood location nationwide. 

They could even end the ads with a catchy phrase like… “What’s in your Vagina?”

Building a better bailout

Here’s a cure for the economic crisis.  Turn off the TV news.  I’m serious.  Then don’t bother to read the front or business pages of your newspaper, if you are one of the few people who still actually reads one.  Ignore the “HEADLINES” at your favorite home-page, and just skip to sports, or entertainment, or go Blog something.  Keep up on political issues other than this one.  And whenever possible look for stories that tell us why the government is more likely the problem and not the answer.  These are usually filled with things called ‘facts,’ ones that can be verified, and the tone tends to be less cataclysmic.  You may find yourself quite at ease, able to sleep at night, refreshed and able to take on new challenges.

 

No, it’s not perfect, but the 24/7 Newsertainment industry is such a complete waste of time—like a bunch of seagulls fighting over the last piece of bread—that getting away from the senseless noise they are making is usually all you need to get a handle on how un-cataclysmic this all really is.   They simply have no interest in your feeling safe or satisfied about anything.

 

 

Poked right in the RGGI

Tom Fahey reported in this Sunday’s Union Leader, that Linda Hodgdon, the State’s Administrative Services commissar had floated a trial balloon on the status of the estimated 18 million the PUC could net from its upcoming regional carbon credits auction this year.  Lynch’s team is looking for money and RGGI might just be sitting there like a shiny penny on the side walk.  Hodgdon, being a good bureaucrat–one who can always find ways to spend money she doesn’t have yet–wants to pick it up and put it in her pocket.

More Republican Boots on the Ground

The New Hampshire Republican Volunteer Coalition (NHRVC) is looking to establish itself as a ‘boots on the ground’ civilian army, recruiting and training activists and campaign volunteers to support what they call ‘Real Republican party candidates.’ What exactly are ‘Real Republican candidates?”

Their Mission statement defines them in just a few words.

“We are a grassroots coalition of highly motivated volunteers, working to elect articulate and principled Republicans who stand for low taxes, fiscal responsibility, free enterprise, individual liberty, and most importantly, the U.S. Constitution.

Our organization is dedicated to recruiting, supporting, and training Republican Party activists and campaign volunteers in New Hampshire.

NHRVC welcomes the membership of any citizen who supports these principles and is willing to get involved”

Given the extensive web presence of Republican, libertarian, and right leaning liberty-minded groups already in place, it will be interesting to see if the NHRVC can attract fresh volunteers from outside the existing right of center political web-culture. If they can create enough new interest, and co-ordinate that with the information and tactical experience already in place, it could go a long way to getting more ‘Real Republicans’ elected to office.

Just how much more?  Find out on the jump.